Well the rest of my day was about the same as the first part. I took my son out shopping for a bit, we had a good time and then dropped my daughter and her friend off at the movies. So I kept somewhat occupied which always helps. Of course I went into the grocery store and took my blood pressure and got 125/70 something and that peaked my anxiety. I have been looking into supplements for heart health. Then I buy them and am too scared to take them. Drives me crazy.
The worst is that its 2:19am and I am wide awake after 2 Paxil, 2 Klonopin, 2 Ativan and 1 Propanolol. Wide awake. That use to put me right to sleep. Now it does nothing at all. I really need to get a real doctor and get this med stuff straightened around because I cant keep going on with no sleep or sleeping in the mornings instead.
I NEED the gym back. It helped with the anxiety and the sleep alittle. My doctor still has not okayed it, I am not sure when he will :( 6 weeks without it has been horrible. It was "my time" I would get on that treadmill and just give it all I had, let all the stress, anxiety, anger, everything go into my workout. Always left feeling healthy and much calmer. It isnt often that I can say I feel healthy either.
I just want to get past Christmas as quickly as possible and on to Spring. I dread the snow and dark and cold. It just seems to really put a huge damper on my mood. Plus I am terrified to drive in the snow so it leave me home ALOT.
I actually let my husband read my blog for the first time today. He had no idea I had one. He seems to think everything stems from having a sick parent and then him dying. Possibly, I also have always believed that people that suffer with anxiety etc are wired differently than other people. Its usually the event that triggers things but the wiring is already there. What I wouldnt give to be the one that figured it all out, came up with a permenant cure, no meds, or anything. Ya I know. Nice dream.
I just want everyone that suffers from mental illness to be able to live their lives, to be able to be treated the same as everyone else even if we are different. We are only different if you choose to look at us that way. We have enough turmoil and pain without worrying about others opinions or comments or labels. The worst part is the doctors are the ones that are usually the most guilty. You go to see them and right away whatever you are saying, they are thinking in their head "what is it now, more anxiety, more health problems that dont exist" Have any of you tried CBT???? If so I would love to hear some feedback on it. I have been looking into it. Seems there is quite a waiting list. I am not classified as severe enough and cannot even get a psychiatrist because I have only been hospitalized once for mental health and you have to been in twice. Funny thing is they do everything they can to avoid admitting you that second time. I was suicidal and got sent home. But with free healthcare, you get what you pay for right.
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Hi Ally - It is generally accepted that psychiatry is not the most effective treatment for anxiety conditions. The general concensus is that CBT is the most effective course of action. There is a waiting list for that in the UK, too (up to 18 months in some areas).
Another therapy which is showing good results is the newer "Mindfulness" therapy. I don't know if you can access a qualified therapist free in Canada, but you can get it privately.
Many CBT therapists use mindfulness tecniques alonside CBT.
However, you can actually get this free in an online study course. Go here-
http://www.actforanxiety.com/ACTforAnxiety_Study_Index.html
- where you can sign up if you're interested. (I am NOT endorsing this product, nor have I any financial interest in it.) My wife signed up for this, but unfortunately didn't keep up the study :(
I hope this helps.
I took an 8 week group CBT course but it didn't help in my case. Perhaps you'd have better luck.
Thank you both for your input. I have learned alittle about mindfulness by reading Jon Kabat Zinn's books. If I could ever attend one of his workshops I would be ecstatic!!! I will for sure look into those links. I am sorry it didnt help for your wife. I just have to say that I think you are amazing being so supportive of her, so many spouses are lost on how to help or cope and you are doing awesome.
I can say the only positive CBT did for me was teaching me my most severe triggers and learn to think of a happy place and then move to rational thought. It's helpful for the anxiety I have on a "good day." Useless when I'm in my freak out/need to be sedated mode.
Have you tried 2-3 Benadryl 30 minutes before bed? It gives me just enough drowsiness (with my clonzepam) to get my mind to shut up. And no addictive or withdrawal considerations. I've been doing it for years.
I sleep better in the morning too. That's interesting.
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