So not much happening in my world. Anxiety is rising still. Find myself googling alot. I had a gastroscopy the other day that I was anxious about, I triple checked with them that I would be out for it and the told me I would not remember a thing. Well they used a benzo and it didnt even touch me so I was fully awake during it. It was awful. I gagged and thought I was going to choke to death. Nothing found during it so onto yet another test. I find myself worrying about Steve going back to work or leaving to go anywhere for that matter, which is bad. I havent been that way for awhile. I think working with him was so comfortable for me as we were together 24/7 and now he could end up working anywhere and any hours.
Depressed about my stupid foot. It is so not right, the pain sucks and its not sitting right it actually overlaps my middle toe. So back to the surgeon to be sent somewhere else in hopes they can fix his screw up. I am 34 I dont think being able to walk without pain is too much to ask.
Wow this is a huge downer of a post. On the upside we are pretty much done christmas shopping. Glad to have it out of the way. Hard to believe its coming so fast.
Winter storm is due tomorrow :( yet another thing that raises me anxiety. Arghhhh

Feeling like blah....Tis the season. I have had a cold that seems to never end and again today stomach issues. I feel just overall yuck. We had family pictures taken yesterday and I am so happy with them. My oldest Madison had her second photo shoot done. She is sooo perfect and made to model I think.
I actually went on No More Panic tonight. I did not log into the forum but I did read. As well as google today. I just want to feel well, emotionally, mentally and physically. I realized today that I am basically an only child. I have no relationship with my sister or stepsister at all. I truly dont even consider myself to have a sister. She is that cruel and full of hatred I dont even want to acknowledge it. I wonder sometimes how my dad would react to her actions towards me and her own children etc.
No hits on a job for Steve or myself, it sucks....I hope it doesnt last long.